Week 12: Power Relationships

     I find the topic of power relationships in family life absolutely fascinating. In today’s world, it seems that children have a lot of the power over their parents. So many children in the modern world get exactly what they ask for and it creates an unbalanced family life. I think this power relationship should be fixed and return to the truth that parents are the leaders in the family. They shouldn’t be harsh, domineering or dictatorial. We’ve seen through research that authoritative parenting is most successful when it comes to raising children. 

     This type of parenting has reasonable demands and high responsiveness. Within this relationship there is warmth and nurturing, an emphasis on independence, as well as fair and consistent discipline. The research has shown that when parents use this form of parenting, children are more capable, happy and successful. When children aren't told “no” enough in their life, that parent has more of a permissive parenting style. Children who have permissive parents are more likely to lack self-discipline, have poor social skills, and may feel insecure due to the lack of boundaries and guidance. Why not put in as much effort as we can to parenting so our children have the best opportunities in their life?

     With power relationships in the family, parents must be united in leadership. It can become very difficult when two people have different views on what parenting should look like. It can cause a lot of uncertainty for the child. The parent-child hierarchy should dissolve when children become adults. We read in the scriptures that a man should cleave unto his wife and they become one. How are they to be an independent relationship if one spouse turns to their parents for every decision? Children should learn how to be independent of their parents, and parents should be working to encourage that independence. 

     I think a couple and family could benefit greatly from having a weekly family council. Family councils allow for an air of openness and feelings of positivity from each member of the family. It allows children to feel as though they have input in the family and can use their own creative mind to benefit the other members of the family. Since the beginning, family councils have only yielded positive results and created warmth and love within a family unit.